isolation

 </> sitting here, high on spice, i am aware that i am blessed. very truly blessed. this lone wolf path that im walking on my ass in my broken down house, with walls i have broken down personally feels oddly scripted. my position in society is not in it. it is above awatching things unfold. i feel like a watchkeeper. i understand that the only way to do this was gonna have to be through this way. alone, scared, poor, cold. it is not able to be written and yet it feels written. im heating up milk, for hot chocolate, eating cold milk coco puffs. it sounds mundane and boring, ive been doing this for months and yet it feels like its the first day on the job every time i get to it. i had asked a special someone to marry me around eight months ago. and i can say. interestingly, that being single was the only way. thats how its always been. all my creations, including my first, their writings and apps/websites were created in the process of extreme solitude, isolation, and heart frostbite. everything is starting to align. this superpower of self-reflection will bring me wealth. its a meditative trance that im in. and im sure, it must be rather alluring how someone can be so self-sustainable. so comfortable with spending all that time in the middle of nowhere just with himself and an imac, keyboard, and mouse. left to my own devices, i see unlimited potential. it is only when other people get into the fray that i see limitations .. problems .. error 404s. ..